By Nacho

So a couple of weekends ago the good ol boys from Skull Skates came through on their Wet Salty Mutt/ Urban Rainer Tour. Their crew consisted of Bill Danforth, Barry Walsh, Marc Tison, Deer man, Brent Jordan along with a few of their homies including none other than the biggest Avril Lavigne fan himself, Owen Woytowich. I believe Dan Mathieu was also stealing souls although I didn’t get to speak with him so who knows. He was French and runs Expose magazine so I’m just guessing.

They arrived on the Friday of given weekend and were scheduled to perform skateboard acrobatics at the skateboard arena on the commons. The rain put a quick halt to that and we all swore to them it was super nice before they got here (the weather network even said we were the hottest place in the country just days before, no shit!). The weather was obviously their fault and they apologized profusely. The boys at Fist Fulla Fives managed to find it in their hearts to let the party happen at their HQ. Ramp Jam ensued, everyone was killing it. Jon, Dave, Nick, Rob and Zach repped hard for the shop on the ramp while the Skull Skates crew tore the ramp a new one with no apologies.

All the while this was happening I was scheming on how to get beer. I drank the one Canadian offered to me graciously by Jon Sparkes and enjoyed it thoroughly, (Thanks Jon) but more was needed to feed my insatiable thirst. I offered up a walk to the liquor store with Greg “I had no idea he expected me to buy the beer” Boudreau. He went out of his way to get us a case of Old Milwaukee? I dunno, its beer, it did the trick, it’s not that bad, I don’t even know why I would complain. We then proceeded to drink those beers and after a few Greg asked me if I was trying to have a beer race with him, I wasn’t but I was still winning. Eventually I got buzzed enough to think I could skate the ramp, but so did Owen so it was all good. We both flailed across the ramp but managed to pull a few things together, I made some heads turn is what I’m trying to say here. The session then ended and talks of moving to a bar commenced. Now getting free beer at a bar without tits is hard, but still I wasn’t about to let it get in my way. Before the crew left Fist Fulla Fives Sparkes handed them off a case of Red Bull for the trip home. I also had one in my pocket, not a case but a singular Red Bull.

Now we soon arrived at one of my favourite bars in the city, that I also used to work at that will remain nameless because I’m not sure if they could potentially get in trouble for what they were about to do. I walked into the bar with no money, bypassed cover, and went upstairs with my Red Bull and propositioned the Bar keep to trade one Red Bull for one Oland’s. He obliged. They turn a profit so who cares? Now I remembered that there was a whole case in the van. I made my case to Tison and we came to the conclusion that trading Red Bull for beer was genius. He brought the case in, I bargained a little and the next thing ya know we have a case of beer behind the bar for us to drink from whenever we needed refreshing. Now we had a deep crew so it didn’t go too far but regardless, we got some free beer. And that my friend is how I cemented my place as the MacGyver of drinking. Make it happen! Oh and shout out to Owen for downing Red Bull and Vodka’s all night and then still passing out before the bar!